We told ourselves that we'd try our very best not to give her the pacifier. But we bought a couple of them just in case. True enough... we had to resort to this.. So today, we reluctantly introduced the pacifier to our little Gabby.

She had just finished her feed and she's still uncontented. I decided to latch her on as it's gonna take a while to warm up the refrigerated breastmilk. The second her tiny mouth found my nipple, she fell asleep!! We concluded that she only wanted to suckle something for comfort sake. So we decided to try the pacifier the next time she fusses after a feed. And it really works!

The pacifier looks big on her little face... :p

Gabby's jaundice level went back to normal and we can bring her home today! On our way home, an amazing gush of happiness and thankfulness filled both Calvin and I. And we both cried and thanked God for the lovely baby that I hold in my arms.

We got home and brought her to her room. She was sleeping soundly as we put her down. We just looked at her, took pictures of her and we were soaked in sweet happiness...

Then...within minutes, she broke into uncontrollable wails. We were both lost... we didn't know what to do!! Fed her, carried her... We were really clueless. We immediately called for help and thank God my mom came by after work to help us take care of Gabby.

The real challenge starts NOW!

We had opted for a single room at the time of admission. But we were told that there are A LOT of deliveries these few days.. Everyone's rushing to give birth before CNY. So we were given a double room the first night. As there wasn't another patient on the other bed, Calvin decided to stay for the night to keep me company. But he was asked to leave soon after the nurse found him sleeping in the visitor's chair in the wee hours... :( hate being left alone...

Good thing my little Gabby was pushed in every few hours for her feeds... It was like lesson time for both of us. I need to learn how to breastfeed her and she needs to learn how to latch on to me. It wasn't as painful as some friends were telling. But getting her to latch on wasn't easy. We were both first timers and we needed a whole lot of practice.

We were transferred to a deluxe suite on the 2nd day. How luxurious! They still didn't have a normal single room. And I'm really not comfortable sharing rooms with someone else, so we took the deluxe suite.

We received a lot of gifts and hampers. Some of them came with cute little soft toys. Calvin used them to decorate the little cot that our baby Gabby was in. So pretty... (^_^)

This morning, the PD came to say that Gabby has very slight jaundice and she recommended that we stay for another night so that Gabby can be put on phototherapy. We did. As she wasn't able to latch on well, I expressed my milk and got the nurses to spoon-feed her (to avoid nipple confusion).

Earlier in the afternoon, while Calvin left to bring some stuff home, I brought my bottle of expressed milk to the nursery and to take a look at my little baby. She was almost naked and only had diapers on. Her eyes were strapped on with a cover to protect them from the rays. The minute I walked close to her, she started wailing... And it broke my heart!! I called out to her and tried to calm her and comfort her with my voice... but she just kept crying and there's nothing I could do! I stood next to her feeling totally helpless. The nurses told me that she was quiet the whole time until I stepped in. It's as if she's complaining to me and asking me to hold her... The nurse suggested that I nurse her... and I tried. She suckled only for a while. She hasn't been able to suckle for long. So the nurse spoon-fed her with my expressed milk. She calmed down after the feed. But I was still sobbing... Looking at her being put under the light really wasn't easy for me, and Calvin wasn't around. Thank God that her jaundice level is actually very very mild. The PD only wanted to be safe. And guess what? About 3/4 of the babies in the nursery are on phototherapy.

My loooong labour story...

I had taken leave from 19 Jan onwards (a few days before my EDD) so that I can have some ME time before 小B arrives. And Calvin's leave only starts on 22 Jan. I had plans to go some places, do some things on my own... BUT... seems like my daughter didn't like the idea. :P Calvin was just joking and asking 小B to arrive on 19 Jan so he can skip what's happening at work... Guess my daughter really listens to her daddy!

For the last couple of weeks, I was asking around and reading up on the different signs of labour. I think my first sign of labour happened as we were lying in bed trying to go to sleep on Sun (18 Jan) night. Suddenly I was engulfed with an emotion that I can't explain. I turned to Calvin, hugged him and told him that our "er ren shi jie" is coming to an end... and I started crying...

At about 2.30am, I woke up to go to the toilet. As I cleaned up after pee-ing, I noticed a bit of blood... I never had any spotting throughout the course of my pregnancy and the little bit of blood probably means that I'm due to deliver very soon! GOSH... I felt really nervous at that time. Calvin happened to wake up as well, and I told him that this could be the day! The 2 of us had a sleepless night thereafter.

I woke up again at about 3.30am and the same thing happened. This time, there was more blood. I ignored it as I had zero contractions and I tried to go back to sleep. When Calvin went to work at 6am, I went to pee again and this time, the blood came in a lump. I was getting a bit concerned. Told my mom who was staying over that night... She told my brother, who then called me frantically with my sis-in-law at the background, urging me to get myself admitted into the hospital immediately. I was thinking, "but I don't have any contractions!" How silly right?? Having a bloody show is actually one of the signs of labour!

I decided to give Dr Ho's clinic a call and see what they say. The nurse told me to pack my bags and go to the clinic to have Dr Ho check me. So, I called Calvin immediately and asked him to come home...

We saw Dr Ho at about 11am. He had me checked and said I was 1cm dilated. I had 2 options: go home and wait (and the wait could last a few days) or I could be induced. Dr Ho's recommendation: induce! He's gonna go on his CNY holiday on Fri and he wanted to be the one to deliver my baby. So, induced I was. That was 11.40am.

With that, we went for a quick lunch. After lunch, back at the clinic, I was strapped onto a heartbeat tracker for 1 whole hour to monitor 小B's heartbeat. Once they determined everything is fine, we then went to the delivery ward and registered for admission. At this time, I still had zero contractions. Once I was admitted into the waiting ward, Calvin went home to get some stuff ready - prepare my red date drink, make 小B's bed, get ready the bottle steriliser, airpot, etc etc.

When Calvin came back to the hospital, it was about 5pm. I was beginning to feel mild contractions. Nothing too painful, but my back was really aching. I was then transferred to the delivery room. By 6pm, the contractions started to really hurt. I kept walking around the delivery room to aid the dilation. When the nurse came to check me, guess how dilated I was?? 1.5cm!!!! For almost 6hours, I was only dilated another 0.5cm! And the pain is becoming unbearable!! I read that if I was tensed because of the contractions, the dilation may be slowed down. At that point, Calvin and I were discussing whether I should take the epidural. We had prayed and wanted to be drug-free. But the pain was really too much for me to take. So we decided to take it. And then, the nurses said it's too early for me to take it... I had to wait till I was 3cm dilated. GOSH... how long more is that gonna be??!!

My contractions were very irregular at this stage. But every time it comes, I would curl like a worm and groan in pain. I was given the laughing gas but it didn't help me at all. I was so angry that it didn't work and I almost threw it on the floor. The nurse came in to check me again at about 12am. I was finally 3cm dilated. I signed the documents for the epidural and waited for them to administer it to me. While waiting, I felt I was gonna die. So painful!!! I remember telling Calvin, if they still don't give it to me, it could be too late cos I definitely wouldn't be able to tahan and stay still for the injection.

I was finally given the shot at about 12.30am. I was taking in soooo much laughing gas I feel I was in an episode of ER. I hear all the voices getting more and more distant... they were all talking to me, giving me instructions... Because I took in so much of the gas, I didn't feel the pain of the injection at all. Immediately after the epidural was administered, I shivered furiously. I was shaking so bad, it scared me. Calvin then came back into the room and I think he was very shocked and worried when he saw his wife shaking so badly. The shivered went on for about 5-10min I think... After that, I was not in pain anymore but I experienced the other side effect of epidural too - vomitting.

I didn't sleep much at all. The nurse came in to check me again at about 3am. I was 6cm dilated at that time. 4cm more to go!! *faint

The next check was at about 6am+. I was about 8-9cm dilated already. So the nurse told me to get them in when I feel a very strong pressure below as if I was gonna poo. Think I started feeling the pressure at about 8am. Dr Ho came by at about 8.30am to check on me. By 8.40am, he said I was ready to push. So he left us with the nurses and I was to start pushing when the contractions come.

8.40am: I started pushing and pushing.
9.00am: Still pushing and pushing
9.30am: Still pushing and pushing. The nurses then called Dr Ho to update him. He then said he'll come over to assist me in the delivery.
9.45am: Still pushing and pushing. The whole time from 8.30am, Calvin was right beside me, giving me encouragement and pushing with me. After almost 1 hour of pushing, he couldn't contain his urge any longer. He had to go take a dump! Just at the same time, Dr Ho came and was preparing to "assist" me. That is, using the vacuum. The nurses frantically searched for the husband! He can't miss this moment after all these hours!! haha... He finally came back just as Dr Ho was gonna start work.

When I saw the vacuum he held in his hands, I freaked out!!! I thought to myself, he's not gonna shove that thing into me, is he???!!! It looked like what you would use to clear your choked sink or toilet bowl!! GOSH!!! I really freaked out.

I kinda lost this part of my memory... all I remembered was me pushing and SCREAMING... I screamed so loud I think the whole delivery ward can hear me! So embarrassing!! Dr Ho then asked the nurses to give me the laughing gas... Finally I felt 小B beginning to emerge... I pushed real hard again... after a few more pushes, she finally came out! It felt as if you've been constipated with one mega humongous piece of shit and when it finally came out, you felt that huge sense of relief. That's exactly how I felt. When 小B finally came out, I felt like something really huge just exited my tummy. The whole tummy suddenly sank. That was 10.12am.

When they handed 小B to me and put her on my chest, nothing else matters... NOTHING!! Whatever else they were doing to me, I didn't care. I looked at my baby in my arms, looked at my husband next to me... I thanked God! Calvin cried when he saw 小B... I requested to be "skin-to-skin" with 小B. The moment they placed naked 小B on my naked chest, she stopped crying. I felt soooo good... I felt like a mommy!!! That was an incredibly amazing moment!

38 weeks pregnant... that means we're left with at most 2 more weeks to spend time alone before 小B arrives. Went for my weekly check up at Dr Ho's this morning and decided to bring Calvin to this very nice place for breakfast - Privé at Keppel Bay Vista.

A media owner brought me there for lunch a few days ago and I loved the breeze... immediately thought of sharing this with Calvin. So here we are, enjoying the breeze, enjoying our brunch, enjoying each other's company...

The Yeo's are back for holidays! Got in touch with Nicole this morning and we decided to try and arrange for a quick catch up in the evening. It's really great that we managed to find time to meet up. They came by to our place and we had a simple zichar dinner together.

This is the first time we met Cheyenne. Seen so many of her pictures and read so much about her on Nicole's blog but nothing beats meeting this sweet little girl in person! She's so smiley!!! I was worried that she'd take a while to warm up, but no... she started smiling at us even at the door! So sweeeeeet.....

Cutey Cheyenne has this amazingly cute ability to pose, smile and wait for the camera to click for a snap. It was so cute! She would look at the camera, wait for the clicking sound and for the adults next to her to start moving before she moves too. So well-trained! Well done, Nicole. hahaha... model in the making!

Now that we've met Cheyenne in person, looking at her photos on Nicole's blog feels a lot more "qing qie"... hehe... Hopefully, we'd get to introduce 小B and Cheyenne before the Yeo's head back to NJ. (^.*)

With just about 3-4 weeks more before 小B arrives, we decided to make a few more trips to see our little nephew Nigel and little niece Amanda. Baby Nigel's a little grouchy today and so we decided to visit him another day and focus on Baby Amanda.

Though she's just 5 days old, I feel as if she knows exactly what's happening around her. Her curious eyes were darting around quite a bit and those eyes are so full of life.

Amanda looks so so much like my bro when he was a baby. She has the same sleeping pattern as her daddy. Even Maureen was talking about how Amanda's lips movement is exactly like my bro's when he's sleeping. haha... so cute!!!

And her hair! I have to talk about her beautiful black hair. So nicely, neatly crowning her beautiful head. I'm sure her hair will be the envy of a lot of girls in future.